The other side of translation

What do they say; men are from Mars, woman are from Venus? I think it goes a step further, I think we all talk different languages, and I’m not referring to French or Italian or Big Sheila.

I have a French business associate who until tonight, I didn’t understand his ways, or what he was really saying in our exchanges. His language in business is different to mine and at times we’ve had misunderstandings. That is, until tonight, St Paddy’s day, a Frog and a Big Sheila came together for a beer to talk a different language. What I would call “Human”.

We all use different turns of phrase to get our point across. I have my own special phrases that I’m well known for…
“Urgent” is definitely one of them – it means, when something is just a bit “out there” or over the top, or too much for some one to bare.
“Warm and Fuzzy” is another, which means, when things are just great, or I want you to know that I’m sending you love, or I’m loving what is going on.
“Good God Maria” is not necessarily religious, but it means, a slightly more Big Sheila “OMG”.

So many different nuances that all make up my “talk”. And you all have your own, or maybe they’re not words, they’re actions, or silly behaviour that all mean something…. To you, or to me, but we’re all supposed to “get it” because we know, or think we do.

I sat with my friend Dave recently talking about the difference between men and women and what we hear and don’t hear. Fascinating stuff really. I recalled a situation with a man who I thought was doing X and he said, “God no, Fleur, he’s saying Y, can’t you see that?”

I sat in a fishbowl with 16 men recently (yes I was the only woman) and I was debriefing with one of the big fish that was sharing his views on what one of the fish were doing in the session. His observations was definitely X, and until I shared that there was more M-N-O-P involved; because at my side of the fishbowl, the swimming action was so more peaceful and contented than what he saw at the top of the bowl, we agreed that there was no cause for concern of an X.

You say, "Tomato", I say, "Tomarto".
You say, "err blurr blurr, oui oui", I say, "ok got it"
I say, "yeah man", you say, "absolutely hate that"
I say, "cat got your tongue?", you say, "nup, I was born with one, just don’t wanna speak to you!"
I say, "you up for this?", you say, "yes"…. But mean no.

So many expressions, which can, to one, or someone else, be taken the right or wrong way.

People tell you what they want you to hear, because they don’t want to create a situation or maybe even hurt you. I’ve had someone say to me, “No I’m not going to marry that person”, but he knew they absolutely were. But they used that language because they didn’t want me to hurt me.....more than the reality of what was really going to happen? Or was it, that they didn’t know how to tell me in “human” language, “I’m getting married”.

Or when people say “I’m going to leave them for you”, but then their behaviour is completely the opposite to that piece of dialogue. There is always something that gets in the way, Easter, birthday, school, a wedding, and a holiday…. We all know some one that has been through this kind of translation problem.

The other side of translation is looking for the signs of what people do to back up their dialogue. Actions translate so well don’t you think?

So many expressions, different languages, different use of words, intonation, suggestion, or poor articulation all causes the end meaning, of what you hear, to be up for interpretation. You think X, they are saying Y and then the result is Z. Who wants Z? It’s the dud, the end, and the worst of the entire alphabet.

Until you might stop and ask - “What do you really mean? What do you want?”.
When someone tells you they don’t’ know, it means, they’ve made a decision. Indecision is a decision. Plain and simple.

I’ve sat with some new and very wonderfully coloured people in these last three days – and every-one of them spoke a different language. It’s been fascinating to listen to, watch and be a part of.

Financial
Frustrated
French
Furious
Cantonese
Curious
Shock factor
Fabulous
And unspoken

So many different languages and shades of human expression to translate; I don’t speak Mandarin, Italian, French or otherwise… Big Sheila is about all I do – but I can say, I’ve developed my vocabulary tremendously over these last few days. I’ve learnt a lot.

We can speak with tongues, action or our inaction. The other side of all of this, and this what I’m beginning to really love about life; is this - be open to hear it or if you’re a little hard of hearing as you get on in life, look for it. We can all become really healthy translators.


What do you want to hear?

Fleur
TBS